..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
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