i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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