Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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