i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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