"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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