You work out of a Hotel?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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