Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
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