if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize