is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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