As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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