Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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