Bisexual people are plain selfish.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
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But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
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All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
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