He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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