If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
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And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
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We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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