Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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