if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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