I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
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the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
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I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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