You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize