bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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