She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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