his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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