how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Will exercising make me less horny?
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