I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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