Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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