maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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