im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone shattered a urinal.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize