We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Randomize