Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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