He disabled his match.com account in front of me
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Randomize