Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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