well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
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