So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize