I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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