there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
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I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
That accounts for only three of the penises
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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