all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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