So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
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there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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