We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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