Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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