I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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