well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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