I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize