No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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