In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize