I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Porn is love you can see.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize