tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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