I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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