Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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