things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Randomize