I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize