They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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